Comments on: Failure to Parent http://phatmommy.com/2006/08/28/failure-to-parent/ Parenting, Homeschooling and Technology Thu, 20 Nov 2008 12:13:33 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.6 By: Todd weldner http://phatmommy.com/2006/08/28/failure-to-parent/#comment-3194 Todd weldner Tue, 29 Aug 2006 19:10:32 +0000 http://phatmommy.com/2006/08/28/failure-to-parent/#comment-3194 A gate? Child proof? Ha. It's only child proof until she figures out how to navigate around, over, or under it, or how to operate it. Kids are very smart and can figure out so much just by watching and listening to us. The gate will not last as long as you will want it to. A gate?
Child proof?
Ha.

It’s only child proof until she figures out how to navigate around, over, or under it, or how to operate it.

Kids are very smart and can figure out so much just by watching and listening to us. The gate will not last as long as you will want it to.

]]> By: Zany Mama http://phatmommy.com/2006/08/28/failure-to-parent/#comment-3183 Zany Mama Tue, 29 Aug 2006 16:57:48 +0000 http://phatmommy.com/2006/08/28/failure-to-parent/#comment-3183 I think as parents we have to use all the tools available to us - for some kids we'll need gates, some kids will respond to soft words, and others will need a leash. It's not a failure to do whatever works to keep you and your family sane, safe, and healthy. On the other hand, I really liked how you were "enlightened" when Leia came. It's good for all of us mamas to give ourselves - and each other - a break. I think as parents we have to use all the tools available to us - for some kids we’ll need gates, some kids will respond to soft words, and others will need a leash. It’s not a failure to do whatever works to keep you and your family sane, safe, and healthy.

On the other hand, I really liked how you were “enlightened” when Leia came. It’s good for all of us mamas to give ourselves - and each other - a break.

]]> By: Joy http://phatmommy.com/2006/08/28/failure-to-parent/#comment-3147 Joy Mon, 28 Aug 2006 17:53:00 +0000 http://phatmommy.com/2006/08/28/failure-to-parent/#comment-3147 Shannon, When my last two came, less than 2 years apart... I put up one gate after another each with a more complicated latch system, only to have them figure out how to get through the gate within a week! You are SO not a failure! It is impossible to keep your eyes on your children 24/7. We have to do our best and put bumpers and boundaries around everything we can!! I love reading your blog. You and Kristen get me through the day!! Shannon,

When my last two came, less than 2 years apart… I put up one gate after another each with a more complicated latch system, only to have them figure out how to get through the gate within a week!

You are SO not a failure! It is impossible to keep your eyes on your children 24/7. We have to do our best and put bumpers and boundaries around everything we can!!

I love reading your blog. You and Kristen get me through the day!!

]]> By: great day http://phatmommy.com/2006/08/28/failure-to-parent/#comment-3146 great day Mon, 28 Aug 2006 17:38:59 +0000 http://phatmommy.com/2006/08/28/failure-to-parent/#comment-3146 I just had to put TWO gates up last week. One in the kitchen doorway and one in the bathroom. both for safety. Kitchen = stairs, bathroom = germs and big mess. If it's for their safety it is in no way a failure! In fact, kudos to you for doing this because you recoginize how fast she is. Instead of being ignorant and not thinking anything will happen! I just had to put TWO gates up last week. One in the kitchen doorway and one in the bathroom. both for safety. Kitchen = stairs, bathroom = germs and big mess.

If it’s for their safety it is in no way a failure!

In fact, kudos to you for doing this because you recoginize how fast she is. Instead of being ignorant and not thinking anything will happen!

]]> By: Sharon http://phatmommy.com/2006/08/28/failure-to-parent/#comment-3135 Sharon Mon, 28 Aug 2006 13:08:41 +0000 http://phatmommy.com/2006/08/28/failure-to-parent/#comment-3135 A safety gate is for safety, not for your lack of parenting. Contrary to the popular myth, we as moms do not have another set of eyes on the backs of our heads. I thought I would never ever use one of those child "leashes" on my child. Now, I don't use one for outings at the mall or the amusement park, but I did end up using one when my parents got their boat. We'd attach it to the lifevest, so we could grab it if my daughter who was younger at the time could have some motion, but could be prevented from going near the gate/door for that split second that it takes you to go after her that might be a split second too long. It wasn't my favorite thing either. I still prefer a hand when walking around the mall. I Love to have a little hand in mine. A safety gate is for safety, not for your lack of parenting. Contrary to the popular myth, we as moms do not have another set of eyes on the backs of our heads.
I thought I would never ever use one of those child “leashes” on my child. Now, I don’t use one for outings at the mall or the amusement park, but I did end up using one when my parents got their boat. We’d attach it to the lifevest, so we could grab it if my daughter who was younger at the time could have some motion, but could be prevented from going near the gate/door for that split second that it takes you to go after her that might be a split second too long. It wasn’t my favorite thing either.
I still prefer a hand when walking around the mall. I Love to have a little hand in mine.

]]> By: Heather http://phatmommy.com/2006/08/28/failure-to-parent/#comment-3127 Heather Mon, 28 Aug 2006 05:36:09 +0000 http://phatmommy.com/2006/08/28/failure-to-parent/#comment-3127 You are hard on yourself...I am still where you were with one child, and the gate is, well, it's just a necessity for safety. I am sure my second will also push me further...for now I know A is easing me gently in as I get my bearings in learning to trust my instincts. Good post, I will come back. You are hard on yourself…I am still where you were with one child, and the gate is, well, it’s just a necessity for safety. I am sure my second will also push me further…for now I know A is easing me gently in as I get my bearings in learning to trust my instincts.

Good post, I will come back.

]]> By: Stephanie http://phatmommy.com/2006/08/28/failure-to-parent/#comment-3126 Stephanie Mon, 28 Aug 2006 05:18:01 +0000 http://phatmommy.com/2006/08/28/failure-to-parent/#comment-3126 I am actually thankful that I had my child that stretches me as a parent and a person first. I never had any delusions that I knew what I was doing! :o) I think that it must be harder to have your easier child first. And remember...our kids are who they are. We have some ability to influence them, but we really can't take full credit (for good or bad!) for their behavior. The good thing is that while being strong-willed as a kid can be very challenging to a parent, it is actually a good trait to have as an adult. The trick as my husband and I joke is helping them learn to use their talents for good rather then evil. :o) I am actually thankful that I had my child that stretches me as a parent and a person first. I never had any delusions that I knew what I was doing! :o)

I think that it must be harder to have your easier child first. And remember…our kids are who they are. We have some ability to influence them, but we really can’t take full credit (for good or bad!) for their behavior.

The good thing is that while being strong-willed as a kid can be very challenging to a parent, it is actually a good trait to have as an adult. The trick as my husband and I joke is helping them learn to use their talents for good rather then evil. :o)

]]> By: Kristi http://phatmommy.com/2006/08/28/failure-to-parent/#comment-3125 Kristi Mon, 28 Aug 2006 05:10:31 +0000 http://phatmommy.com/2006/08/28/failure-to-parent/#comment-3125 How could you not do a gate? I won't tell you what I've discovered on my bathroom floors after neglecting my kids for hours at a time...you gotta do a gate. How could you not do a gate? I won’t tell you what I’ve discovered on my bathroom floors after neglecting my kids for hours at a time…you gotta do a gate.

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