Freedom

// 4.28.05 // Filed under: My Daughter, Parenting, Thriving

I just read a post by Emily over at DotMoms. She asks, “How much child-free time do you have?” Huh? Oh, you mean like when I take a shower or go to the bathroom? No? Then you must mean when the kids are in bed and I’m doing laundry and dishes. No? Wait a minute… I vaguely remember a time when I could leave the house alone and actually DO SOMETHING FUN.

Tonight I went out by myself to pick up pizza for dinner. I drove in silence – no KidzBop, no Star Wars theme song, no questions or chatter. I got out of the car and walked – no, I strode, swinging my handbag and lifting my face up to rain – into the restaurant. No stroller. No concerns about kids dashing into the street. It was pure, unadulterated freedom. And at the same time it was quite pathetic how excited I was to be out alone picking up a friggin’ pizza.

Before my second child was born, I had lots of child-free time. I had weekend-long scrapbooking retreats, days spent getting massages and pedicures, shopping excursions. My husband was more than willing to take over with our son and give me my space. Then the Princess came along and the breastfeeding days were here again.

I love nursing. In my opinion, it wins hands-down when compared to sterilizing bottles, mixing formula, making sure the temperature is right, etc, etc. Just whip out the boob and you’re in business. I’ve gotten quite good at discretion, too. Just the other day I nursed the Princess in Starbucks in the mall. Sat right in the front window in one of those deep comfy chairs and enjoyed my frappacino while she enjoyed hers. But I digress.

Nursing definitely puts a damper on your child-free time. My daughter likes to nurse often, so being away from her for more than a couple hours is pretty stressful on the party taking care of her. And I’ve already discussed her sleep issues in a previous post, so you know I don’t get much free time at night. But I take it when I can. I still find time to scrapbook, read blogs and get my hair done. And I actually read a lot more books when I am nursing than when I am not. Well-meaning family and friends ask me why I don’t get her on a bottle so I can enjoy some time alone. One thing I’ve learned from my first child is that time is fleeting. Soon, I won’t be nursing anymore and I will miss that close, quiet, bonding time. By this time next year, I’ll be back to weekend scrapbooking retreats. And a year is such a very short time.

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